Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
莫名其妙的自我感动，确实抓住了一些疫情时期的梗，但整个故事七零八碎，还涉及人体试验和动物虐待，很没必要也很不sensible，以及结尾太突然了。
致敬所有经历过或者还在遭受新冠的人们，致敬所有为了生活努力的你我！
各种cliche和想象得到的点。。刻意想搞笑。。哎。下饭都不行
是真的很好笑。那种胡闹的幽默。展现了隔离时不同的人群：过渡防护的，完全不当一回事的，被迫转行的，改变经营方式的Etc.虽然但是，他们还是不戴口罩啊？没有社交距离啊？于是在温馨的落脚点里，楼管妻子还是去世了，告诉你，这一切都是真的。
第一次看懂法式幽默，居然能把疫情隔离的生活拍得如此欢乐😃向所有团结在一起的人们致敬～
最后想多提一句那两个小朋友，太可爱了。我永远喜欢青梅竹马。
剧情有点浮夸，不过通过这部电影，看到的更多是自己当时的回忆，略显一般的剧情也就不那么重要了。看完对某人说那个疯医生难道是在影射Dr Raoul么。。。
看过的最好一部疫情题材电影，幽默温情以及残酷的离别。
导演就是被关久了发疯写出来这个本子吧 虽然是轻喜剧 就还是很假 每个人都很做作
陈旧的滑稽戏用在今天确实有点不合时宜的尴尬感，不过还是蛮好笑。
剧本很薄弱 分镜并不是一直保持在最好的状态 但是我对福山润演这种角色真的无法拒绝……
街区冷漠的邻居因为covid彼此打开心扉这个主题很不错。群戏太精彩了：有钱就变坏（脾气）的顶楼复式大男人家庭、胆小如鼠的老公的家庭、寡妇开店的老太、确诊楼管的西班牙裔丈夫、潜心疫苗研究不惜献身的博士、争当网红的年轻cp、以及昼伏夜出的抗疫护士。yvan attal演的太好了，颠覆以往形象，抽搐那段笑抽了。dany boon真的有才！且只有法国能把这事拍的如此轻松又温情。唯一的不足就是生活感比较强，不像电影像sitcom
没追过这个番，但是就这个故事来说就是一个感人的童话，怪物救了女孩，两个来自不同国度的人，触碰了就会被诅咒，互动都很细腻，两人的相处也很温暖，但是羁绊好像也没多深，真的没啥内容。最后掉入水里变成花没懂，但是看结尾应该是破除了诅咒，没懂
不管怎样画风还是很还原的ww
走着看吧
不想要你为我而死，有你在身边是我唯一的心愿。有过冲动与彷徨，陪伴是最好的结局。从这点上来说，这个故事弥补了我在别的故事里的遗憾。
温情又幽默，感受到了法国人在疫情面前和国人的不同之处。捅鼻子那段也太酸爽了吧
疫情之下居家隔离的一群法国人众生相，挺搞笑，最后温馨。都是病毒惹的祸。
只希望世界和平，没有疫情，没有灾难！人民幸福安康！
所以整个剧情就十分不完整不流畅不自然还有不合乎逻辑的地方
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