Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
为了小黄人必须给5分啊！我已经买了比电影票贵很多很多的的周边了，快让我继续买周边！！！
开头的Universal jingle竟然不是Minions唱的☹️但我还是爱小黄人！
片头曲是邓紫棋 有三番唐人街 有中国新年 有杨紫琼 有十二生肖 感觉很target中国市场了 而且确实很好笑
有一些是为格鲁长大之后铺垫的
明明很可爱，中国元素也有下功夫融入的很好。🥺
6/10. Just for fun. For Y70 too.
那个googly eye stone是跟《瞬息全宇宙》的梦幻联动吗2333
果然没有人能拒绝小黄人嘤嘤嘤，什么都答应他们！！！这部前传中国元素拉满，不过我有个疑问，英女王冠冕难道不如中国一块又生肖又八卦的金镶玉值钱吗？笑死，中华武术超神发挥了，这下做实中国人均武林高手的传言了。片头中文歌我在电影院笑出声…
可爱！Chrissie 说她不喜欢中国元素搞得那么刻意，可是在中国明明没过审🤣
首先，中国文化融合得还不错，十二生肖和唐人街是中西都比较熟悉的元素，请了杨紫琼配音，开头曲还是中文的（虽然不咋好听。然后，小黄人依旧超可爱，除了kevin、stuart和bob还加了otto为主角，去年预告的时候就看过otto历经千辛万苦找到项链那一段，还很感慨就像我的法学院历程，然后卖萌片段就是真“大眼萌”。最后，全篇立意简单直白，find your inner beast，团队协作的重要性，也没有be，全篇看得很开心。另外，最近看了steven carell演的the office，觉得他配音gru真的是再合适不过了。
6.5 - 可愛的、搞笑的、輕鬆歡快的無腦動畫片。Bob快來媽咪懷裡！
牙套萌神是亮点，主要看他憨憨的执著。其他有小黄人的内容都很好笑。但是故事本身真没啥深度，而且大部分时候都过于夸张、嬉闹。特别是当男主角一心想当坏人时，如果没看过之前的电影，真的有点难跟孩子解释，这个片子里究竟谁是好人谁是坏人，感觉除了牙套萌神外，其他的都有点不老实lol
2022.07.10@AMC。可能受疫情和更换导演的双重影响，剧情推进非常生硬，更像是若干片段拼凑在一起的大杂烩，最后几条线被强行扭在一起，以欢度春节结束，让我不禁恍惚今夕何夕。和《坏蛋联盟》对比着看还挺有意思的，两个故事都发生在旧金山，小黄人里旧金山的城市特征显然更胜一筹——铛铛车、唐人街、崎岖的老城区，还有死亡谷的出镜，感觉让自己重温了去年圣诞和今年六月的加州之行，但故事实在无法深究，哪怕有石头和《瞬息全宇宙》的联动，可惜连杨紫琼的加盟也不过是把她一下子打回功夫女星的刻板印象里。小黄人的走红本就是个意外，做了主角之后本能有一些新颖的尝试和深度的挖掘，无奈这个本子实在是太过平庸，可惜了这个IP。
牙套萌神是亮点，主要看他憨憨的执著。其他有小黄人的内容都很好笑。但是故事本身真没啥深度，而且大部分时候都过于夸张、嬉闹。特别是当男主角一心想当坏人时，如果没看过之前的电影，真的有点难跟孩子解释，这个片子里究竟
小黄人绝对是大ip 卖萌没剧情也我可以给五星 何况这集有一点点剧情了
有没有人觉得里面换来的石头很像《妈的多重宇宙》里的石头？杨紫琼也正好参与了配音诶。这种类型的电影，可爱加治愈就完事儿！观影体验很轻松 ，可惜坐在后排的几个中国女生全程都在讲话，还开闪光灯摄屏，素质大概被狗吃了。
不值得去电影院看，剧情太杂乱，混了中国传统元素也没得救
不知是不是第一部里小黄人单干没有卑鄙的我系列效果好的原因，所以第二部又把Gru加回来了，剧情确实要丰富一些，还多了一个新小黄人otto。本来想打和前几部一样的三星，多的一星是小黄人们用无辜大眼求来的
还可以吧，不难看有一些主人公的内心成长，小黄人戏份这次是真的多有相当一部分都没啥意义，全场看下来很多地方都承接了之前的剧情以至于连接了小黄人宇宙。而且这部片也太讨好中国观众了，超多中国元素，杨紫琼配音的武林高手，石头上加塑料眼珠子，瞬息全宇宙？？导演编剧你们是自己喜欢还是潜移默化的往里扔政治正确的东西啊？还有那个骑摩托车超好的黑叔叔戏份也太别扭了，硬抬升黑人形象 :) 总体来评价的话三波人的剧情都没啥吸引力而且各玩各的，自己耍自己的宝，最后的大战爆发有点差，打斗到结束也很平庸，生肖宝石就是成龙历险记抄的嘛。 再拍我也不知道他们还能编出啥来了。
原以为这次又要跟第一部一样靠IP糊弄观众，没想到观影体验超出我预期。故事十分简单也没什么深度，但就是这种专注输出纯粹笑料和没心没肺情节的定位把这部电影的爆米花属性给拉满了。光是这点就足够吊打同期的侏罗纪世界甚至雷神4了。
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